Last night!ARG! So while they were "brushing their teeth" Diego and Athen were in fact getting a slightly old pumpkin out of my bedroom(don't ask- there's no good explanation) and pulling out its innards, which they then tried to cram down the bathroom sink, unsuccessfully, thanks to the blessed stopper. So, naturally they pulled out the stopper to fill the drain, and then went to bed. So after they were asleep and it was safe for me to go upstairs (you can't go upstairs while kids are trying to procrastinate sleep, it makes the process dramatically longer!!), and low and behold my ladies room trip was greeted by a clogged sink and moldy pumpkin guts all over the sink and floor. ARG!! You know how they say children look like angels when they sleep? Well, I thought peeking at their little angel sleeping faces might calm down the tremors quickly turning full scale earthquake in my psyche, but it was NOT helpful. Rather I ended up quickly leaving the room, quite disturbed by my strong inclination to wake them up and spank their little tooshies. WHOA! HELLO, CALM DOWN WOMAN! So anyways, I scooped the crud from the sink, went downstairs to cry/pray. Jason has this joke saying in a deep southern accent "I need Jeeeezus!" which basically means "I'm about to to have a colossal freak out to be tempered only by some severe divine intervention" I was needing some "Jeezus" in a bad way, but all joking aside, the praying worked, and after some very specific scripture study about Patience (which I could stand to study a whole lot more!), we all ended the night on a good note.
So, not to be diminished by the goings-on of last night, I thought it'd be a great time to catch you up on the most recent hilariousness Diego has come up with.
1- On Saving the world! Recently, upon learning of the naughty bad guys (drug cartel) in Mexico, Diego announced that he knew how to handle the problem. " I'm just going to go there, and teach those guys about Jesus, and if they're mean to me, well I will KEEP teaching them, and when they learn, they wont want to make those bad choices anymore!" Oh man, that was the cutest thing! It might even work, who could discount such a sincere little guy?
2- On being a Spy! Diego has been having a hard time trying to decide what he wants to be when he grows up. Doctor, farmer, ninja, and spy are all so tempting! One day he decided he was probably going to be a spy, and explained to me "I didn't tell any of my preschool friends that I'm going to be a secret agent spy, because then when they are grown up, they will know and it wont be a secret! And what if they grow up to be a villain or tell a bad guy who I am?" Hehehe.. so clever, he really thought that out.
3- On homeless dogs! The other day, we were headed to school and I could not convince him to get in the car. He was standing at the sidewalk making a loud exaggerated whimpering sound for a good five minutes. I was annoyed that he wouldn't get in, but curiosity vetoed the annoyance so when he finally gave up the mission and got in the car I listened very intently as he explained to me, " I saw a dog catcher drive by (probably a rectangular truck or something) and I was making puppy sounds to get him to come catch me, and take me to the pound. Then when he went home, I would sneak out and open all the cages of the dogs and they could be free and go home! And if they didn't have a home, I would bring them to our house and we would be their family."
4. On Camouflage. A while back we were at the sporting goods store when Diego noticed a rack of camouflage jumpsuits. I was surprised to see how expensive those things are (seriously over $100 for something so ugly and random), but more surprised when Diego picked up a large one from the rack and backed away with it. He stood against the wall and in a loud whisper said, "MOM! Can you see me??"
5. Upon learning there was free popcorn and Philly cheese-steaks in the box seats at the football game: "This is the BEST PLACE EVER!"
6. On blood. There was some blood on the kitchen floor from a cut Athen got, and upon seeing it, Diego tried to step on it. Disappointed that it was still there when he moved his shoe, he exclaimed, "Oh man, if only we had a pet vampire!"
Oh man, I love that kid!